It's Okay Not To Be Okay
It’s okay not to be okay. God doesn’t ask you to hold it all together—He just asks you to come. Weary, broken, tearful... He’s not going anywhere.
Originally published on my blog as “It’s Okay Not to Be Okay,” this post reflects my personal struggle with faith, my emotions, and the myth that Christians always have to be “okay.”
When faith feels heavy instead of light
There’s this quiet pressure many of us carry around—this idea that if we’re walking with God, we shouldn’t struggle.
We should always be filled with peace,
joy,
and certainty.
And if we’re not, something must be wrong with us… right?
Maybe you’ve heard it said—
“Just give it to God.”
“Rejoice always.”
“Trust and obey.”
And while those are true...
they can feel like spiritual platitudes when your heart is aching.
Or when life feels overwhelming.
Or when you’ve done your best to be faithful…
but you're still not okay.
So let’s say it clearly:
Being a Christian doesn’t mean you’re always fine.
You can love Jesus deeply and still wrestle with discouragement, anxiety, doubt, or grief.
You can believe in His promises and still feel tired in the waiting.
And maybe the most freeing thing you need to hear today is this:
It’s okay not to be okay.
You’re not the only one
This ache you’re feeling?
You’re not alone in it.
You’re not the first to feel it.
And you’re not the only one God loves in the middle of it.
The Bible is full of people who walked closely with God and still broke down at times.
David
The “man after God’s own heart” wrote:
“How long, LORD? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?”
— Psalm 13:1
And also:
“I am worn out from my groaning.
All night long I flood my bed with weeping…”
— Psalm 6:6
David loved God fiercely, yet he still had nights where he couldn’t hold it together.
Elijah
The great prophet who called down fire from heaven?
Right after his victory on Mount Carmel, he ran into the wilderness, lay down under a broom tree, and begged God to take his life.
“I have had enough, LORD,” he said. “Take my life…”
(1 Kings 19:4)
Elijah had seen God move in undeniable ways—and still, he hit a wall of fear, exhaustion, and despair.
Paul
Yes, even Paul—the bold apostle who taught us to rejoice in suffering—spoke about being:
“...under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself.”
— 2 Corinthians 1:8
He despaired.
This wasn’t surface-level discomfort. It was soul-deep anguish.
So if you’ve ever wondered if your heaviness disqualifies you,
if your sadness makes you spiritually weak,
or if your struggle means you’ve failed…
Let the testimony of Scripture quiet those lies.
The truth about spiritual struggle
The presence of pain doesn’t mean the absence of faith.
Grief doesn’t cancel out your trust.
Doubt doesn’t mean God is disappointed in you.
What if being real about where you’re at is one of the most faithful things you can do?
Because Jesus didn’t come for the polished.
He didn’t say, “Come to me once you’re okay.”
He said:
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
— Matthew 11:28
Rest isn’t offered after you pull yourself together.
It’s what He gives right in the middle of your mess.
You don’t need to clean up your emotions to be loved.
You don’t need to pretend your heart isn’t breaking.
You are seen.
You are known.
And you are held—even in the moments when you feel like you’re falling apart.
When everything in you wants to quit
Sometimes the weight of disappointment is what breaks us.
Other times it’s just the long, slow ache of waiting.
The dream that hasn’t come to pass.
The prayer that hasn’t been answered.
The exhaustion of trying so hard for so long with nothing to show for it.
And you think—
“I should be stronger than this.”
“I should be more grateful.”
“Other people have it worse.”
But can I tell you something?
God isn’t rolling His eyes at your pain.
He doesn’t dismiss your sorrow.
He doesn’t compare your grief to someone else’s.
He doesn't call you weak because you feel weary.
Psalm 34:18 says:
“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
Not disappointed.
Not frustrated.
Close.
He draws near to the brokenhearted.
He bends low to listen.
He gathers every tear (Psalm 56:8) and whispers, “I’m still here. I still see you.”
Keep coming, even when you’re limping
Maybe today isn’t a day of victory.
Maybe it’s not even a day of vision or strength.
But it can still be a day of returning.
Of crawling back into Jesus’ arms, even if you don’t have the words.
It’s okay to just be.
To just sit with Him.
To cry.
To breathe.
To rest.
Because you being "not okay" doesn’t scare Him.
A closing whisper
If you hear nothing else today, hear this:
You are not failing God because you feel fragile.
You are not spiritually broken because you need a break.
You are human, and you are His.
And He is never more tender with you than when you’re at the end of yourself.
So breathe.
Lean in.
Let go of the pressure to be okay.
Let Him be your refuge.
Let Him be your Shepherd.
Let Him carry you awhile.
Because it’s okay not to be okay.
And He’s not going anywhere.
With love and belief in you,
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